Men, if we are to love our wives, we must, among other things, pursue them. On December 6th, 2003 this is what I promised my wife as I proposed to her: I promise to always pursue you in romance.
Now “pursuing in romance” does not merely mean sex and sensuality. It means something more foundational. To pursue our wives in romance means to show them and help them to feel that we value them.
Read More »
We spend 6 months to a year preparing ourselves to get our driver’s licence. We spend days, weeks, months, and sometimes even years preparing for our wedding day. We spend close to 15 or 20 years or more in school preparing ourselves for our careers.
But the Day of Judgment takes a lifetime of preparation. And it starts from birth, or before. One may ask, “How can someone be preparing for Judgment Day (or anything) before they can talk or even before they are born?” That’s just it…, they don’t. But that does not mean preparation doesn’t or shouldn’t happen.
I’ve been thinking quite a bit about a conversation I had over Christmas. Some friends and I were discussing behavior and habits and why we often react to certain situations in certain ways. A guy in the group was explaining that he had issues with a particular family member. When pressed on the nature of his problem and why he couldn’t treat this family member with respect, he said, “But you don’t see the ‘home face’ that I see at home when no one else is there”. That sort of hit me as an interesting way to explain his problem. He was pointing a finger towards this person’s faults, yet he was also pointing out that people are not always whom they seem to be to the outside world.
Since that day, I’ve been spinning that phrase around in my head and wondering just what sort of ‘home face’ I have and what the family members in my household would say about my countenance and presence when I’m at home. I think every spiritual leader of a household needs to reflect on and recognize with humility the influence they have over the home, not only through their own actions, but also through their countenance, presence, attitude and demeanor. The effects of this are far reaching, as you might imagine. How is my ‘home face’ when I arise in the morning? Is it set on Christ or on the pains of the day? Does my family see my face in the morning? As I come home into my house after a day’s work where God has provided, do I see it that way and does my face look that way? Or rather, is my face and spirit downcast because of my perceived misery in my cushy job?
It is a beautiful day for Saint Louis FamilyCamp. After working with our good friends at Windermere Conference Center, we have come to an agreement that all food purchases for FamilyCamp are optional. In our contractual agreement we have no financial obligation to eat meals provided by Windermere.
So… why should this matter to you? Within our cost calculator, you’ve probably noticed that meals were a significant part of the FamilyCamp cost. Like all camp ministries, Windermere makes a large portion of their income from food. However, food is now something that can be completely optional for your family. You can either eat meals in the Windermere cafeteria (which is very good by the way), or you can bring your own meals and save a TON of cash.
How much is a TON?
Let me give you an example… If you have a family of five, this is what it would look like:
2 adults + 3 kids staying in economy housing, eating meals in the Windermere cafeteria = $420, compared to only $192 if you bring your own meals.
So, if you were having a hard time affording camp, you could save around $150 by purchasing and preparing your own meals (already figuring that it would still cost some money to purchase your own food before camp).
This doesn’t mean that families aren’t encouraged to eat at Windermere, but rather that the FamilyCamp team is doing everything possible to assure financial barriers are removed so every family can attend this camp. I believe whole-heartedly that Saint Louis FamilyCamp 2009 has the ability to completely shift your view of family forever. God will use this camp to encourage singles, strengthen marriages, equip parents, and develop Christ-centered children. To me, a dollar amount can’t be placed on this type of experience… I hope you’ll agree.
So what are you waiting for? The next pricing break will end soon… Sign up today for Saint Louis FamilyCamp 2009!
What do you want to be when you grow up?”
How many times has that question been asked to kids? The answers you get are often comical. But when you ask that question to parents about their children, it comes with a little more seriousness. Of course many parents might get excited about the thought of their little ones becoming a doctor or a pastor or a lawyer or a professional athlete or the president of a company or of the United States or a missionary or whatever. But at the same time there is sure to be a fair amount of fear in parents as well, when they think about the future of their children, especially when they look back on how many sinful and painful things they went through.
In keeping with part 1 of this two-part post on how we need to trust and delight in our Sovereign God, specifically when it comes to our children, the focus of this post is on how God is sovereign over prodigal children and every aspect of the future of our children.
It might be helpful to first define this term, “prodigal”, before we talk about the Lord’s providential control over them. A “prodigal” is a person who drives recklessly full speed ahead with little to no thought as to their direction or destination. They are all accelerator and no steering; passionate drive without prudent direction. Most simply, a prodigal is someone who wastes their life, fast and furiously. Read More »
If the LORD is Sovereign (that is, if He is in absolute, complete control over and in everything), which the Bible makes clear that He is, then we should not merely believe it, but delight in it (Him). For if we see something as true, but not sweet, then we will never truly worship God for it. And we must see that if it is true of God, then it must be sweet! So, in an attempt to see and savor the sweet and sweeping sovereignty of God, let us apply it to children. This first part, of a two-part post, will focus on God being sovereign over the life and death of children.
Despite what we may often think, we are not in control… of anything. Probably one of the most common of areas where this is made abundantly clear is in conceiving a child. For many couples getting pregnant seems almost too easy, but for many others it seems impossible. The fact is, it is impossible for anyone and everyone if the Almighty Creator does not grant it. This is so, because the Sovereign God alone opens and closes the womb.
Probably the most famous of passages in regard to this is Psalm 139. In this Psalm, David praises the LORD for being the One who formed him, knitted him, and made him (vv. 13-15). Surely David was not ignorant of the physical act that causes pregnancy, but he was also not ignorant of the Primary Cause (God) that works in and through the secondary causes to accomplish His eternal plans (Prov. 19:21).
Sweet and Practical Applications: Read More »
My dad wasn’t perfect. If he was writing this post, he would tell you that. Today as I consider his mistakes, they don’t frustrate me as much as they give me hope. Despite his failings, God used my father to pass the legacy of faith from his generation to my own. He did this through modeling a Christ-like devotion to our family, our church, and the world.
I don’t have the words to accurately describe the impression this type of parenting makes, but thankfully a man by the name of Terry L. Johnson does. In his writings of, “The Family Worship Book”, Johnson articulates these beautiful words that are seared into my mind daily:
“Children growing up with the daily experience of seeing their parents humbled in worship, focusing on spiritual things, submitting to the authority of the word, catechizing and otherwise instructing their children will not easily turn from Christ. Our children should grow up with the voices of their fathers pleading for their souls in prayer ringing in their ears, leading to their salvation, or else haunting them for the rest of their lives.”
Thank you Daddy for the ringing in my ears! May it never escape me.
This video is of my 3 year old daughter. May God make the ringing in her ears overwhelming!
While writing an earlier post, “Honey, Take Me for Granted“, I was not aware how this perspective so drastically changes my view of my wife and of being taken for granted by her.
First I was a wee bit annoyed by how my wife was expecting me to do so many little things for her, even though I knew she appreciated them (me). But then, after writing the post, I realized (and told her so) how thankful I really am that she takes me for granted.
She counts on me. She trusts me. She knows that I love her. By taking me for granted in how I open doors for her, check the house in the middle of the night when she hears a “strange noise”, etc…, she lets me know that she knows that I love her. She has grown to expect certain things from me (at least partly) because I just always do them.
Not that I am perfect or perfectly consistent. No, not at all. The point of all of this is how thankful I am that my wife knows and expects that I will treat her a certain way. She keeps me accountable for it. I am glad and thankful to the Lord that my wife knows how she should be treated, expects to be treated as so, keeps me accountable for treating her so, is humbly thankful for such treatment, and lets me know that she knows that I truly do love her by treating her so.
A few years ago I was having a phone conversation with a good friend. The purpose of his call was to invite me to a guys gathering at his house that night. My wife already had plans with some of her girlfriends, so I was unable to hang with the boys. I’ll never forget my response to him… It’s bothers me to this day.
I said,
Sorry bro… I gotta babysit my kids.
The contemporary definition of the term babysit is ‘to take charge of a child while the parents are temporarily away.’ Basically, what I had told my friend is that I had to do something that wasn’t my responsibility.
Unfortunately, we live in a culture that embraces this language for our men. When fathers watch their kids, they are temporarily stepping in for mom. It’s not because they ‘want’ to, but because they ‘have’ to. Compare this type of language to the challenge made in Deuteronomy 6 to parents. Fathers were charged to teach their children about God while they sat at home, walked on the road, when they went to bed and when they woke up!
So fathers… as God changes our hearts may we change our language. We don’t ‘have‘ to baby sit our kids, rather we ‘get‘ to teach, train, protect, love, and shepherd the blessings under our care.
Whether you are married, planning on getting married someday, or are a good friend to a married person or couple, you know that spouses can often take each other for granted.
Really this is not confined to marriage relationships. Friends, co-workers, employers, parents, children, and in countless other relationships, taking others for granted or being taken for granted by others is all too common. However, the marriage relationship is one of the (if not the) easiest of relationships for taking one another for granted.
Most wedding vows do not contain this statement, “I promise to never take you for granted.”
Why not? Surely we should not take each other for granted, right? Right. We should always appreciate the acts of kindness, faithfulness, and love given by our spouse, right? Right. Read More »
